Goat lips.

May 9th, 2008

Did you know that some of the softest leather in the world is made from goat skin? Their skin is so incredibly soft, and aside from a part of their tail, their lips are the smoothest and softest thing to touch, ever. I’m addicted to them. They hate that I fondle their lips every time I’m near them, I’m sure.

It’s Friday.

May 9th, 2008

Thank God.

Bumper to bumper confusion.

May 7th, 2008

Driving home from work yesterday, this car pulled in front of me on the highway with a bumper sticker that read, “BACK OFF! I’M A MEXICAN!”

That doesn’t make any sense, I thought… why back off? Because of all the illegal-immigration drama? Is it supposed to be funny? It’s not funny. Maybe I just don’t get it, maybe it’s a Mexican joke? Maybe I don’t get it because only Mexicans would laugh?

So then I pulled up closer to them, in their black Mercedes, and thought, they’re not Mexican at all! What kind of thing is this? A white person saying, how clever, I’ll put on this BACK OFF, I’M A MEXICAN bumper sticker on my high-end Mercedes and people will laugh along with me!

And then I pulled even closer to them (whilst going 70mph, we’ll ignore the fact that I wasn’t driving safely), and realized that I had misread the bumper sticker all along. The funky font made it difficult to read from a safe distance, and it did not, in fact, say “Mexican,” it said, “Musician.”

BACK OFF! I’M A MUSICIAN!

I thought about it for another minute (and I BACKED OFF! his bumper) and realized that “Musician” makes about as much sense as “Mexican.” At least to me. Maybe I’m not artsy enough to get it.

And maybe I should market the BACK OFF! I’M A MEXICAN! stickers?

The devil within.

May 6th, 2008

I don’t really know how this got started, but whenever I ask Samantha to glare at me, or anyone else, she gives the most menacing, hateful glare you could ever give someone. And then she cracks up afterwards.

I told Mark enjoy it while it’s cute now, because when she’s 14 this is going to be the only facial expression we’re going to see from her.


Protected: Waiting for a sign.

May 5th, 2008

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